1. “That’s weird...” “What?” “Nothing it’s just, this guy—“ “You mean our murder victim?” “Yeah, it’s just his tweets” “What about them?” “Every single one of them is... good.” Two homocide detectives reading my tweets after I get murdered for being right about everything.

  2. It’s my instinct to write off awards shows as fun, frivolous circle jerks for elites and what not, but every once in a while they serve as a platform for someone like Michaela Cole to deliver a speech like this, and the whole thing feels incredibly vital in that moment.

  3. You seriously can’t throw a rock in this town without hitting some former child star— OH GOD I THINK I JUST CONCUSSED VICTORIA JUSTICE.

  4. Grappling with the colonialism and racism inherent in transnational adoption while I wait for my drug dealer to arrive.

  5. Haven’t slept in 30 hours but that will not stop me from getting fucked up at Six Flags tonight. It’s literally why adderall was created, dummy.

  6. Better put me in the psych ward, because I am bOy CrAzY!! Haha I hear boys even when I’m alone and see them when they don’t exist. This is a cry for help!!

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